This is My Psychosis

Social Butterfly (1)

There will be times when you know that you have to stand down, turn around and walk away. People always tell you that some good things never last and I agree with this statement except for one minor change. Good things do last but they get altered.

It is difficult for a person who is anti-social to roam around, flitting like a butterfly in a crowded room. We tend to grab a glass of whatever is served then proceed to the corner of the room wherein you can see every single conversation happening without having to join in or be noticed. It’s not that we have something against people or we want to be noticed that way but rather, it’s the simple fact that we are comfortable where we are and the few people that we are close with.

I do not remember when I have become anti-social. In fact, most people do not believe it because I am super friendly and an extrovert. But, what they do not notice is that I am like that only to people I know already. Yes, I can make friends but I do not start conversations. So, why did I become a self-made-recluse of some sort?

There are a lot of reasons -some of them has to do with the fact that I have battled with inferiority complex, insecurity and low-self esteem for the longest time. I have my own demons and whatnots -who doesn’t right?  Still at the end of the day, I realized that being shunned by people and put down by those who are supposed to be close to me [by blood as well] -it has prepared me to adapt in different situations.  It made me find my voice and made me claw my way out from six feet under. Unfortunately, it made me cringe and step away from people.

I don’t know what I am blogging about… I was going towards a certain direction and then I go sidetracked. In short, I have issues.

Who doesn’t right?


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This entry was posted on February 9, 2012 by in psyKOIsis and tagged , , , , , .
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